Had another checkup today and Rocky's doing great … strong heartbeat. Mama on the other hand needs iron pills. And will subsequently need stool softener. BOO. I'm hoping that the extra iron helps my energy levels (which are seriously LOW as of late).
In addition to feeling exhausted I'm also feeling huge. Have gained 3.5 pounds in two weeks (which makes for a total of 6 pounds in the last 4 weeks, not so bad). The number on the scale is starting to get up there. It's starting to frighten me (even though I knew it was coming. Even though it's normal. Even though I gained the weight with Syd and lost it).
I'm sorry but I just do not understand those mothers who are all "I feel so glowy and sexy and ALIVE! when I'm pregnant!" I DO NOT GET IT. I mostly feel like eating caramel brownies and taking a nap and then going to bed at 8:30. Simple chores overwhelm me, not to mention going on trips of any kind with my almost-two-year old (do I even need to recap the mini-break we took this week? And about how our kid was up until 11 one night and then 9 the next? And about how she barely napped? And about how freaking exhausted we were when we got home yesterday? And about how hotels and toddlers DO NOT MIX? DO I EVEN NEED TO TELL YOU ABOUT IT, INTERNET?).
And if my husband looks at me sideways? Wink wink? Eyebrow eyebrow? He basically gets told that if he gets anywhere near me HE WILL DIE A SLOW AND PAINFUL DEATH. Ain't THAT romantic?!
When people talk about cold glasses of champagne or the delicious glass of red wine they had I WANT TO KILL THEM. And know what? I don't even drink all that much. It's just that I'm not allowed to have it that bugs the crap out of me. And same goes for sushi. And turkey sandwiches. And hot dogs. And soft serve ice cream. I can't have it? I WANT IT.
Lastly? The other day at the Apple store my husband was in for a Genius Bar appointment because his iPhone 3GS has not been behaving. This little 19-year-old twit girl with yellow eyeshadow and the neck cut out of her fancy little Apple store t-shirt widened her eyes at me and was like "ARE YOU KIDDING ME? YOU'RE NOT DUE FOR TWO MORE MONTHS? YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE ABOUT TO FREAKING POP!" I tried to explain my previous history with 10 pounders and good-naturedly told her about how I carry big, etc. But you know what I should have done instead? Ruined intercourse for her FOREVER. Scared the living sh*t out of her regarding babymaking, birth, and reproduction of any kind. I should have told her that most women get pregnant LIKE THAT! EVEN ON THE PILL! EVEN WITH CONDOMS! And then? SNAPPED MY FINGERS IN HER FACE! BOOYAH!
Anyway. We are doing fine. And quite obviously more naps and more brownies are in order.