You know how on 30 Rock Liz Lemon always slaps crap out of Lutz's hands? If you ever see me drinking a Diet Coke after 4 pm, you have total license to do EXACTLY that to me.
Let me paint you a little picture:
The other night we were out for dinner. I knew that it was going to be a late-ish night and that we'd be putting the kids down late, so I decided that instead of ordering my usual Water With Lemon and making my husband order a Diet Coke so I could take shots of it, I decided that I am a Big Girl and I want my OWN Diet Coke (can you tell that I hang with a preschooler every day?). So yeah. I drank (and thoroughly enjoyed!) my Diet Coke AND a refill of that Diet Coke and I would have drunk more MORE MORE if the service had been any better.
Fast forward four hours. The kids are in bed, the house is shut down. My husband is passed out next to me. I am exhausted. My stomach hurts. I am jittery. I'm alternating between the chills and the sweats. I start wondering … what on earth is wrong with me? I start freaking out to the tune of "OH NO I HAVE THE STOMACH FLU?!" My body is so tired that I'm literally shaking. I can feel my legs and arms in total sleep mode but my eyes won't shut and my mind will NOT turn off. I'm lying in bed worrying about spending the next two days puking my guts out, then the kids will get it and I WILL DIE, then that turns to "Did we lock the front door?" (yes) "Is the baby ok? IS HE BREATHING IN THERE?" (yes) "Are those t-shirts I bought at H&M going to fit me?" (NO) and so on and so forth until around 1 am I remember the Diet Coke. The Damn Diet Coke.
Upon this revelation I stumble out of bed at 1:25 AM, dump the contents of my medicine cabinet all over our microscopic bathroom trying to find the Benadryl. I somehow find it, slug one, go back to bed.
And I wake up 7 hours later with dry mouth feeling like I went on a frathouse keg bender. And I have to nurse a baby and fix a bossy little person her WA-FULL, MAW-MA!
The moral of the story? Just say no to the caffeine, Manda.
The more you know! *shooting star*