Well, the Fancypants Preschool called back yesterday morning and we immediately scheduled a tour. I hurried into the shower and loaded up the children and off we went.
I could tell you a long story here, but I'll skip to the end and say that I was underwhelmed. The school was very nice! We recognized some friends from Parent & Me class! Everyone seemed really nice. "Nice" is really the operative word. It was a very … neutral (?) place for me. The small classrooms were very orderly in a preschool "PRIMARY COLORS!!" kind of way. The kids all seemed happy and busy. The play areas outside were very nice. It was … nice. I liked it. Sydney fell in and played with the other kids who were outside with ease. It is extremely obvious to me (and to the lovely – albeit SMUG AS HELL – preschool director) that she is very, very ready for school and will do well (and really that's not even the issue. She could probably thrive at many different schools).
Honestly, after everything that's been said to me about this particular Fancypants Preschool? I was expecting glitter and rainbows and unicorns and to be Blown Away! But it didn't have the sparkle or magic ingredient that I hoped for. Even so, after I left our visit at the Fancypants Preschool I was still very conflicted. Here was a place that I would be able to drop my Sydney off and go. The only expectation on me was that I pay her tuition and fill out her paperwork. Wasn't that … what I wanted? Wasn't the whole point – of going there and checking it out – that I was OVERwhelmed with the co-op and all the expectations? After all it was a perfectly NICE place with a very respectable reputation and everyone there seemed really nice and it would be a place where she'd be safe and would learn a lot and … and …. Why didn't I feel any BETTER? Or relieved?
There was nothing WRONG with the preschool, but there is something just Spectacular about the people and the kids at our co-op. And now I can see that more than ever. I really, really want our daughter to be a student there.
And that was really bothering me. So I called the co-op office AGAIN. And I prefaced the phone call with this: "Can I just vent for a minute?" And the answer was yes. And so I did. I was totally balls-out honest. I even told her that I'd been to another preschool that morning and was so stressed out that I was considering sending my daughter there instead. And the person on the other end of the line listened and promised to help me work through a solution. I believe her. I believe that the people at the co-op give a crap about my sanity. I believe they are going to help me work out a solution that's best for our entire family. I haven't given up yet.
I've scheduled Grandma to take care of Elijah during my workdays (YAY!! Grandma to the rescue AGAIN!). He's coming with me this Thursday because she's out of town, but otherwise I have officially weaseled my way out of Tag Duty. That's a start. There's a possibility I can buy my way out of some of my work days and there's also the possibility that Syd willbe able to get into the MWF class. I am hopeful again.
So. This week will be her first week of school. My baby is going to preschool. And so is her Mama.
Lord, have mercy.
(p.s. In response to the wonderful comments on yesterday's post I first want to say THANK YOU. Secondly, I want to say for the record that I have no reason to believe that Syd will do better at preschool when I'm not there. The concerns really are more about MY sanity. She's a fiercely independent little booger. In fact? When we visited Fancypants Preschool today? We were still in the parking lot getting ready to go in and she said "Mama? You can just take me to the school and then you go home and then you come and get me later? Ok?" And it had to be explained to her that we were "just visiting." Homegirl LIKES school. When I work at school I actually make the effort to give her as much space as possible so that the teachers have LOTS of opportunities to teach. Heh.)